Moving to a new city is an adventure filled with excitement and new possibilities. Whether you're relocating for work, education, or a change of scenery, starting this new chapter in your life can be both thrilling and daunting.

Amidst the thrill, finding the a roommate to share this journey with can significantly enhance your experience and turn your new city into a place you'll truly call home.

If you find the wrong roommate, however, your experience can be a nightmare.

To help you make sure your new roommate is the perfect one for you, we've compiled this list of tips for finding, vetting, and living with someone who can hopefully become a good friend too.

From determining your preferences and deal-breakers to utilizing modern technology and engaging with communities, we'll guide you through the steps to finding a roommate who complements your lifestyle and aspirations.

Here are our six tips on how to find a roommate in a new city.

tips for finding roommates in a new city

1) Determine Your Preferences and Deal-Breakers

Before you start your search for a good roommate in your new city, reflect on your own preferences and identify deal-makers and deal-breakers. Truly nail down what the perfect roommate for you is, what your pet peeves are, and where you can compromise.

Knowing what you want and what you can't compromise on will significantly narrow down potential matches and help you find roommates who align with your lifestyle and values.

Reflect on Your Lifestyle and Habits

Consider your daily routine, sleep habits, and work or study schedule.

Are you an early riser or a night owl? Do you work from home or have a demanding job with irregular hours?

Understanding your own lifestyle will help you find someone whose routine complements yours, reducing potential conflicts in the future.

Create a List of Roommate Preferences

Make a list of qualities and characteristics you'd like to see in a roommate.

Are you looking for someone who is tidy and organized, or do you prefer a more laid-back approach to cleanliness? Are you comfortable rooming with someone of the opposite gender?

Think about whether you're open to living with someone who has pets, and if so, what type and size of pets you're comfortable with.

Identify Deal-Breakers

Equally important to knowing your preferences is identifying deal-breakers. These are traits or habits that you absolutely cannot tolerate in a roommate.

Deal-breakers could be related to smoking, substance use, noise levels, or even specific personality traits that clash with your own.

Consider Hobbies and Interests

While not essential, having shared hobbies or interests with your roommate can be a bonus.

If you enjoy similar activities, it can lead to bonding and opportunities for fun experiences together in your new city, perhaps even as friends!

2) Utilize Roommate Search Websites, Apps, and Social Media

In today's digital age, finding a roommate in a new city has never been easier, thanks to the plethora of roommate search websites, apps, and other online resources available.

These platforms are designed to connect individuals seeking roommates, making it convenient and efficient to find someone who fits your preferences and lifestyle.

After you determine your preferences and must-haves for your new roommate, you should start your search by using dedicated websites, apps, and even social media. Some dating apps even have separate versions for making friends or finding roommates.

Here are some avenues you can take:

Social media platforms like Facebook, Reddit, and Twitter are not just for sharing photos and updates; they can also be valuable resources for finding a roommate. Join and post listings on local Facebook groups or pages dedicated to housing, apartment hunting, or city-specific communities. These groups often have members looking for roommates or posting about available rooms.

Some websites and roommate finder apps exist for certain demographics so that you can find a like-minded potential roommate as well. That way, you can find a roommate you're comfortable with and reduce any risk of conflict. For example, the aforementioned Rainbow Roommates is intended for LGBTQ+ individuals in New York City.

In addition to standard roommate search platforms, some cities offer roommate matching services that use sophisticated algorithms to match compatible individuals. These services consider various factors like lifestyle, habits, and interests to find the best roommate match for you.

Here are some other tips for how to find a roommate in a new city by leveraging technology:

  • Create an appealing profile: When using online platforms, you should create an appealing and honest profile that showcases your personality, interests, and what you're looking for in a potential roommate. Include information about your lifestyle, hobbies, and requirements for your living arrangement.
  • Use filters: Take advantage of platforms' search filters to refine your searches based on factors like preferred location, budget range, and any other essential criteria. This will help you quickly identify potential roommates who are a good match for your needs.
  • Reach out and communicate: When you find potential roommates who seem like a good fit, reach out and initiate a conversation. Send them a polite message expressing your interest and introducing yourself. Communication is key to building a positive roommate relationship, so be open and transparent from the start.
  • Arrange virtual meetings: Since you're searching for a roommate in a new city, it may not be possible to meet potential candidates in person immediately. Instead, arrange virtual meetings via video calls to get to know them better and ask important questions.
how to use technology to find roommates

3) Use Your Networks

In your quest to find a roommate in a new city, don't underestimate the power of your existing networks.

Your personal connections can lead to valuable recommendations and potential roommates who have a higher level of trustworthiness.

Inform your friends and family about your roommate search in the new city. They may know someone who is also looking for a roommate or have contacts in the area who can help with your search.

If you have attended a college or university, consider reaching out to its alumni association. They often have online forums or groups where alumni can connect, and you might find fellow alumni seeking roommates in your new city.

Explore online alumni groups or forums specific to your educational institutions. If your alma mater organizes alumni events or gatherings in your new city, make an effort to attend.  Engage with other alumni living in your new city, and you might come across someone who is also seeking a roommate.

You can use social media platforms to ask for roommate recommendations from your connections as well, whether they are friends, family, or alumni. Post about your roommate search and share any preferences or requirements you have. Your network might have just the right person in mind.

4) Attend Meetup Events and Roommate Mixers

While online platforms are convenient, meeting potential roommates face-to-face offers a deeper level of insight.

In-person interactions allow you to gauge nonverbal cues, observe social skills, and have more natural conversations. It's a chance to see if you genuinely connect with someone beyond the confines of a digital profile.

Look for meetup events and roommate mixers in your new city. These events are often hosted by local community organizations, apartment complexes, or social networking groups. They provide an excellent opportunity to meet potential roommates face-to-face, gauge their personalities, and see if you share common interests.

When attending these events, keep these tips in mind:

  • Be open, friendly, and approachable
  • Respect others' boundaries and privacy
  • Share your story and aspirations for your new city
  • Be authentic and honest about what you're looking for in a roommate and what you bring to the table
  • Exchange contact information and follow up after the event
  • Ask relevant questions about lifestyle, daily routines, and preferences for household responsibilities
  • Engage in conversations not only to find potential roommates but also to expand your social circle and get a better feel for the local community

Overall, attending meetup events and roommate mixers can be an exciting and productive way to find your ideal roommate. It allows you to build connections with like-minded individuals and explore potential matches on a more personal level.

However, remember that attending meetup events is just one step in the process of finding a roommate.

Take your time to reflect on the interactions you had and how well you connected with potential roommates. Rushing into a decision can lead to regrets later on.

5) Conduct Thorough Interviews

Just as you would ask your landlord questions, as you progress in your roommate search and narrow down potential candidates, conducting thorough interviews becomes a critical step to ensure a successful living arrangement.

Interviews provide a deeper understanding of each potential roommate's personality, lifestyle, and compatibility with your own.

By asking the right questions and actively listening, you can make informed decisions and find the best roommate match for your new city adventure.

Prepare a List of Essential Questions

Before the interview, prepare a list of questions that cover crucial aspects of living together.

Ask about daily routines, work or study schedules, social activities, and any past roommate experiences. Inquire about habits such as cleanliness, noise tolerance, and communication preferences.

Here are examples of questions to ask potential housemates to get you started:

  • What's your routine on the weekdays and weekends?
  • What do you do in your free time?
  • What time do you usually wake up and go to bed?
  • What conditions do you need to sleep well?
  • Are you neat or messy?
  • How do you prefer to communicate with people, whether for requests or about any issues?
  • Do you smoke, drink, or partake in any drugs?
  • Have you lived with anyone before? What did you like or dislike about the experience?
  • Do you have any pets or plan to get pets?
  • Do you like living in a warm or chilly apartment?
  • Do you have any food allergies?
  • How do you feel about overnight guests?
  • What's your worst habit?
  • What chores do you like doing or hate doing?
  • Are you introverted or extroverted?
  • What things are you comfortable sharing with a roommate?
  • Do you have any preferences or deal-breakers yourself?

It's advisable to interview multiple potential roommates before making a final decision. This will give you a broader perspective and help you compare candidates more effectively.

Tips for Roommate Interviews

As you conduct your interviews with potential roommates or ask them questions during events, you should generally aim to assess the compatibility of your lifestyles and values. Look for common ground and shared interests that can foster a positive living experience.

During the interview, be transparent about your own habits, preferences, and what you're looking for in a roommate. Honest communication from both sides is essential for building a harmonious living environment.

Similarly, don't hesitate to address any concerns or red flags that arise during the interview. If something gives you pause, ask for clarification or more information. It's better to address concerns early on than to ignore them and face issues later.

Each step of the way, you should pay attention to how potential roommates communicate during the interview. Trust your instincts. If something seems off, listen to your intuition so you don't commit to a bad time.

6) Review Legal and Financial Matters

As you approach the final stages of finding a roommate in your new city, it's essential to address the legal and financial aspects of sharing an apartment.

Taking the time to review these matters will help establish clear expectations and prevent potential conflicts in the future.

Openly discussing responsibilities and creating a roommate agreement can ensure a smooth and enjoyable living arrangement for both you and your chosen roommate.

Understand Legal Implications

Before finalizing your decision, familiarize yourself with the legal implications of having a roommate.

Check your lease agreement or rental contract to ensure that subletting or sharing the apartment is allowed. Being aware of the legal framework will protect both you and your roommate.

Discuss Rent and Utilities

Transparently discuss how you will split rent and utilities. Decide whether the split will be equal or based on room sizes and amenities.

Establish a plan for how the payments will be made, and make sure both parties are comfortable with the arrangement.

Allocate Household Responsibilities

Outline the household responsibilities and decide how chores will be divided. Set expectations for cleaning, maintenance, and shared resources.

Having a clear understanding of each person's responsibilities will prevent disagreements over household duties.

Establish Communication Guidelines

Effective communication is key to a successful roommate relationship.

Establish guidelines for discussing any issues or concerns that may arise during your cohabitation. Encourage open and respectful communication to address problems promptly.

Respect Personal Space

Respect each other's personal space and establish boundaries within the apartment.

Consider designating specific areas for personal use to create a comfortable living environment.

Create a Roommate Agreement

A roommate agreement, or a rental agreement, is a written document that outlines all the terms and conditions of living together. For instance:

  • Rent
  • Security deposit
  • Utilities
  • Living expenses
  • Cleaning
  • Other household chores
  • Quiet hours
  • Guest policies

This agreement serves as a reference point and can help prevent disputes in the future.

Seek Legal Advice if Needed

If you have any concerns or uncertainties about the legal aspects of sharing an apartment, consider seeking legal advice.

A consultation with a lawyer specializing in housing or tenant rights can provide valuable guidance.

Stay Flexible

While it's crucial to establish clear guidelines, it's also essential to stay flexible.

As you live together, you may encounter new situations or preferences that require adjustments to the agreement. Be open to revisiting and updating the roommate agreement if necessary.

Tips for a Successful Roommate Relationship

As you begin cohabiting, fostering a successful roommate relationship becomes essential to creating a harmonious and enjoyable living environment.

Here are some valuable tips to ensure that your roommate experience is positive and fulfilling:

  • Openly and honestly communicate
  • Embrace flexibility
  • Respect each other's personal space and environmental needs
  • Be tolerant and understanding of each other's quirks and habits
  • Find compromises to create a balanced living space.
  • Fairly divide household responsibilities and contribute equally
  • Resolve conflicts amicably, calmly, and constructively
  • Establish clear house rules
  • Be considerate of each other's schedules and commitments
  • Celebrate each other's successes and milestones
  • Engage in shared activities to strengthen bonds

Even if you don't have shared interests, you can do things together like cooking, exploring, or simply watching a movie. These shared moments can build camaraderie between roommates.

Remember, a successful roommate relationship is built on trust, respect, and understanding.

Embrace the opportunity to share this new chapter of your life with someone, and you'll find that having a compatible roommate can elevate your new city experience to new heights.

tips for being a great roommate


Finding a roommate in a new city can be an exciting yet challenging endeavor.

By following the six essential tips outlined in this guide, you'll take the right steps to ensure a great start to your new living situation.

Remember that finding the right roommate may not happen overnight, and that's okay. Be patient and open-minded throughout the process. Avoid rushing into a living arrangement with someone who doesn't feel like the right fit. Take your time, weigh your options, and trust your instincts.

Additionally, remember to exercise caution when meeting strangers.

Take the time to vet potential roommates, verify their identities, and gather references if possible as background checks. When you meet in person, go somewhere public, like a local coffee shop. Safety should always be a top priority when searching for a roommate online.

Frequently Asked Quesitons

David is the co-founder & CMO of DoorLoop, a best-selling author, legal CLE speaker, and real estate investor. When he's not hanging with his three children, he's writing articles here!

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The information on this website is from public sources, for informational purposes only and not intended for legal or accounting advice. DoorLoop does not guarantee its accuracy and is not liable for any damages or inaccuracies.